We live in a remarkable time; communication, entertainment, commerce,
and work are evolving at a pace unheard of just 5 years ago. Multiply
this with the need to stay current, to learn new languages of business
and technology, to absorb information bombarding us from all directions
and what do you get? A searing measure of stress added to adult lives
already complex with too many responsibilities and personal goals.

My clients, generally small business owners, tell me their stress comes
from too little time, too many responsibilities and not knowing where to
turn first. Sound familiar? Stress can cuddle up and become your
unwanted companion. So, here are some very lo-tech tips to navigate
our modern world and minimize stress.

1. How do I handle everything on my plate?

Here’s a novel idea: don’t. Learn to selectively accept requests; being
asked doesn’t mean you have to say ‘yes.’ Use your power to choose.
And remember: if you continue to over extend yourself, you’ll minimize
your ability to handle those responsibilities you truly value.

Seek support. Find at least one person who will really listen to you
without judgment. The right family member, friend, or coach could be
invaluable.

Stop trying to control every aspect of your life. We never really know
what will occur even in the next moment. Take actions that move you
toward your intended outcome and know you will handle whatever
materializes.

2. There aren’t enough hours in the day!

You think so? We all have the same 24 hours. Consider how you
spend them; is there something you can delegate or give up? Make an
hourly calendar of your week - be honest. What‘s draining the time
you’d prefer to devote elsewhere?

3. How can I avoid over-reacting when I’m stressed?

Envision your best outcome and write it down. What steps will make it
real? I know you’ve handled many stressful events in your life. How?
Was there something that can help your current situation? Even if you
didn’t choose what’s happened now, you can choose your response.

Take time for relaxation and healthful living practices. Don’t use the
upset in part of your life as an excuse to abandon healthy routines.
These can anchor and support you as other elements of your life are
altered. You’ll cope more easily.

Connect with your spiritual side. Use prayer, meditation, reflect on
spiritual literature. In the writer’s words you may find an experience that
mirrors your own.

Consider minimizing stress. What activities, situations or people literally
suck the energy right out of you? You know what they are - why are you
tolerating them? How you can confront and resolve those lingering
circumstances and get rid of them?

4. What if I’m afraid I just can’t do the things I must?

The most insidious obstacle in our lives can be our own self-view.
Ironically, we’re often faced with circumstances that reveal the hero in
us, yet our own view about our value and capability can be more
flattening than a speeding locomotive.

If you find you’re unable to replace ‘I can’t’ with ‘I can’, try this: Get in
touch with 3 people whose opinions you respect. Ask them to email
you weekly, with one thing they admire and respect about you. Don’t
ask mom or your significant other.

What you learn about yourself may be surprising; this new self-
awareness will be powerful. Nothing is more fundamental to overcoming
obstacles than the belief that in fact, you can. Use “I can” as your
starting point and you’ll find every one of these suggestions much easier
to put into practice.

Andrea Feinberg, M.B.A., graduate of Coach University and a
Certified Strategic Business Leadership Coach, is the president of
Coaching Insight. Andrea’s clients identify and maximize the
untapped potential in their underused intangible assets so they
enjoy enhanced marketing outcomes, more productive and
engaged employees, effective goal setting and, occasionally, time
off. For more information, please visit http://www.coachinginsight.com
She welcomes your comments at 631.642.7434 or
andrea@coachinginsight.com.

You all know what procrastination looks like when you’re engaged in it. Sometimes it seems to sneak up on you out of the blue and before you know it it’s consumed a large part of your time. I know that many are even reluctant to look at it because doing so makes them feel weak, inadequate, powerless and so on.

I would like to show you that there is actually a very quick and easy way to bring this menace to it’s knees. Just be honest with yourself as you follow the discussion below. If you feel you need more personal attention with this matter the contact URL is below.

What is the purpose of procrastination?

Well it’s supposed to:

1. Put off some undesirable task, so that,

2. You can do other more interesting things in its place, so that,

3. You can feel happy, at peace, content, joyful, satisfied, entertained, successful, and/or fulfilled.

So in other words:

(A) Procrastination makes you feel happy, at peace, content, joyful, satisfied, entertained, successful, and/or fulfilled.

Well is that the case?

If you look at what it really feels like to procrastinate you most definitely notice: a sense of worry in the back of your mind, feeling distracted, having trouble focusing on what you are doing, unable to fully enjoy what you are doing, thoughts wandering uncontrollably, feeling tense, perhaps feeling guilty, feeling irresponsible, and generally not feeling very good about yourself.

Does that reflect statement (A)? Absolutely not!

So if you recognize that isn’t it time that you stop unconsciously buying into the seduction of belief (A)?

If you do you will free yourself and reclaim a measure of control over your life that you have likely never experienced before.

Dr. Nick Arrizza is trained in Chemical Engineering, Business Management & Leadership, Medicine and Psychiatry. He is an Energy Psychiatrist, Healer, Key Note Speaker,Editor of a New Ezine Called “Spirituality And Science” (which is requesting high quality article submissions) Author of “Esteem for the Self: A Manual for Personal Transformation” (available in ebook format on his web site), Stress Management Coach, Peak Performance Coach & Energy Medicine Researcher, Specializes in Life and Executive Performance Coaching, is the Developer of a powerful new tool called the Mind Resonance Process(TM) that helps build physical, emotional, mental and spiritual well being by helping to permanently release negative beliefs, emotions, perceptions and memories. He holds live workshops, international telephone coaching sessions and international teleconference workshops on Physical. Emotional, Mental and Spiritual Well Being.

Business URL #1: http://www.telecoaching4u.com

Personal URL: http://www.telecoaching4u.com/Spirituality_And_Science.htm

Motivation is the safest and easiest way to success in whatever you try to accomplish. If you are motivated enough, you will do anything to succeed, which means that you sooner or later will succeed. If you’re keeping a motivated attitude, nothing can stop you, no matter whom or what tries to. Motives are the reason why you’re trying to accomplish a certain goal and this goal is something you really desire. So before you can use this great goal setting tool, you must know what your goals are because they are what motivate you. So start by writing them down;

Personal goals that drive you

• Which character and personality are you motivated to develop?
• Which person do you really desiderate to become?
• Which activities do you have ambitions to perform?
• What do you really crave to learn? Another culture, a foreign language, ski-jumping?
Hot Tip! The need for power is the desire to make people behave a certain way with the power of human motivation. This type of person is in it for the power and could care less about the competition.
• Which material objects are you motivated to possess? Are you craving a motorbike, a mansion, a Mercedes Benz?

Career goals that motivate you

• Which work tasks are you encouraged to perform?
• What do you really love to do?
• Which dream career would you do anything to establish?
• Which position do you really desire to obtain?
• Which salary do you desire?
• Does the thought of becoming your own boss drive your?

Goals for your health that motivate you

• Which thoughts and feelings are you motivated to have in your everyday life?
Hot Tip! Have energy. Caffeine will substitute for health for a while, but one way or another, you need some energy to have daily motivation.
• Which kind of mental health do you desire?
• Which physical health conditions are you motivated to achieve and keep?
• Do you desire weight loss or gain? Are you encouraged to exercise and workout?
• If you’re a smoker, are the benefits of quit smoking driving you?
• Are you driven by the benefits of a deep spirituality and higher enlightenment? Are you craving peace of mind?

Your financial ambitions

• Does the benefit of financial security and prosperity motivate you? Do you crave things in your life that money can buy which makes it more comfortable and enjoyable?
• Do you have ambitions of getting the money you need and are you willing to do whatever it takes to get it?

Relationship goals that push you

• Which kind of relationship are you devoted to achieve and keep with your family, friends, co-workers and other people?

These are just examples of how you can start the process if asking yourself questions about what you really desire or crave for the important areas of your life. This is the beginning of developing your life the way you are really motivated for. You need to specify your goals so that they are crystal clear. Then you must find out what it takes to achieve them. And finally you have to execute your plan. After a while your goals will start to be fulfilled.

Terje Brooks Ellingsen is a writer and internet publisher. He runs the website 1st-Self_Improvement.net.
Terje is a Sociologist who enjoys contributing to the personal growth and happiness of others. He tries to accomplish this by writing about self help issues from his own experience and knowledge. For example, motivation as a drive for self improvement and achieving financial goals.

Many people think that they could improve their life if only they could find the time. They desperately want to change, to realize their dreams, whether that is gaining self-confidence, dealing with anxiety, having better relationships or acquiring money. They think that, when they find the time, they will make the changes they have promised themselves. The truth is they will never deliver on those promises because they never will find the time.

We all have busy lives. We have commitments to work and family. We leave early in the morning and go to work, work hard all day with no time to think, and then, when we get home tired, we have other commitments thrust upon us. We’re not happy. There’s never enough time for your self. Your job may be fantastic, your finances secure and your family loving, but there’s a hole in your life. But, you keep saying to your self: I’ll make the effort as soon as I find the time.

I’ll let you into a secret: you will never find the time. With the lifestyles we live today, time is not something we ever find. We must MAKE the time! It’s not always easy, but it is possible to make a little time each day just for your self.

First you need to sit down with pen a paper and write down your schedule. Don’t leave anything out; be honest. You probably already know what it is you’d like to do if you had the time, so write down how long each day you would like to have. Now, go back to your written schedule and start to analyze it to find out where you can make time. You can begin with looking at how you begin your day. You may yearn to meditate, or practise yoga, or write or find time to contemplate. Well, could you get up a half hour earlier? Most of us can make the effort the get up that little bit earlier. If you do, you could make the time to spend on yourself.

How do you spend your lunch hour at work? Most people tend to chat with their colleagues, go shopping, and do errands or simply zone out. Could you cut down on these? Perhaps not every day but on your schedule, write down when you could make the time, even if it’s only two times a week.

What about travelling to and from work? Maybe you could make the time there. Read the books you’re always promising your self you’ll read one day. Listen to the self-improvement CDs you’ve bought but never had the time to listen to. If you planning on getting fit or doing some exercise, ask your self if you could run or walk to work - at least part of the way - rather than driving or taking the bus.

Evenings can be a problem when it comes to making time. Most people are pretty tired when the get home from work. Then there’s preparing meals and spending time with your family and friends. But again, you could possibly make time here. How much time spent at home in the evening is quality time? Do you tend to zone out in front of the TV? If you do, you can stop watching the TV and make the time for your self.

Weekends are by far the best place to look when making time for your self. Start by looking at the schedule you’ve written down and again be honest. Do you tend to sleep, spend hours window-shopping or just potter about the house for hours on end? We are all guilty of wasting some of our time, especially at weekends. Write down some time on the schedule of yours when you can spend time just on yourself.

Finally, talk to those around you. Explain to them you desire to spend time in improving your self. If you’re honest and show them you’re committed, you’ll be surprised how much support you receive. After all, become a better you is going to improve their lives too.

Making time is hard work but making it is worth the effort. Once you begin to spend time doing the things you’ve been promising your self, you’ll feel so much better. Don’t worry if you sometimes don’t stick to it. Schedules can be re-arranged: after all, our lives are ever changing. So, what are you waiting for? Go and start making the time.

Setting goals and objectives is a process which has very wide application in business, and it was certainly a part of my own business training which I had to put into practice regularly in the years that followed. Some of the better businesses and organizations will also incorporate personal goal setting into staff development, as part of the personnel (human) resources routine. But what about you as an individual? Can you use goal setting as a tool to help you achieve success?

Goal setting can, indeed, be a very useful, sometimes powerful assistant to your personal success. If you incorporate goals and objectives into your personal planning, whether short or long term, then your road to success will have a better foundation.

Success?

Success at what? That is entirely up to you. If there is something in life you want to succeed at, then there will no doubt be some goals you can set to help you along the way; like stepping stones across a river when success is the opposite bank.

In reality, you can apply goal setting techniques to any part of your life, whether it is to do with work, personal relationships, where you want to live, or a personal hobby or interest. So long as you set realistic goals at each stage, then they can be a very strong personal incentive, which will prepare you for the next stage. Eventually you will be able to look back and see how far you have come, and you can wave goodbye to those stepping stones and go on to new ones on another journey to success.

If you settle down and think clearly about what you want to succeed in, and then what you need to achieve in order to get there, you will quite naturally give a structure to a plan which you will follow; a structure that will incorporate goals you will need to achieve along the way. As with business goals and plans, your personal goals need to be realistic. If you have never driven a car and decide you want to be a Formula One race driver, then it does not make a lot of sense to go directly to Ferrari HQ and say “Here I am, can I race for you in next week’s Grand Prix?”

If you are determined enough, you may become an F1 driver, but there are a few little goals to achieve first. That applies to just about anything. You need to pinpoint the key achievements along the way to success in whatever it is you wish to succeed in, set an appropriate series of goals, and then tick them off one by one.

It is important to think clearly about your personal goals, as they are just that, personal. They are not your husband’s goals, you parents’ goals, or your brother’s goals, they are yours. Keep focused on what you want to achieve, not what others would like you to achieve from their own viewpoint. Use the opportunity to incorporate lifestyle goals into your plan, such as living by the sea, having a nice house, anything that is important to you. Even happiness benefits from goal setting; you can think about everything that would make you happy, and then set goals to achieve each of those elements.

Having decided your goals, then put them together in a plan that is realistic, otherwise you may be despondent after missing a goal which was impossible anyway. Set a reasonable timescale, and then try to aim for it step by step. If your chosen area of success is a competitive one, then remember that most people will just give up. But you will not give up, will you?

This setting personal objective article was written by Roy Thomsitt, owner and part author of the Routes To Self Improvement website.

“Character is power.” -Booker T. Washington

Do you want to build an army of outstanding leaders in your organization? What are you doing to make it happen? Mentoring is an effective way to accomplish that goal. While discipling involves character building, the focus of mentoring is skill
development. Chip Bell, a mentoring expert, defines mentoring as the “act of helping another learn. Mentoring is about teaching through consultation rather than placing restrictions. According to Hackman and Johnson, authors of Leadership: A Communication Perspective, mentors often become sounding boards for their protégés. Why should you waste time mentoring employees? Let’s analyze the mentor-discipling nuances. Discipling and mentoring can compliment each other.

According to Organ and Bateman (organizational behavior gurus), close mentor-protégé relationships can be invaluable to younger people seeking professional competence. Allen and Poteet, mentoring experts, further that state mentor relationships are used to teach the protégé about his job, provide organizational insight, and address personal issues. Discipling is usually conducted to a broader audience. Mentoring can be seen as advanced discipleship. The primary emphasis in most businesses is career/skill development, not character building.

If you follow my logic, let’s explore a mentoring application. Do you remember the hit TV series Dallas? It showcased the Ewings, a wealthy Texas family. You have J.R, a greedy oil tycoon. Can you imagine J.R. instructing his protégé about advancement? Stab your co-worker in her back. Get ahead by any means necessary. Is this character building? The focus of most organizations is not character building. Discipling is not perfect either. Judas Iscariot betrayed Jesus, his teacher (John 18:1-8). Where are the process flaws? The infallibility of mankind and individual choice! Mentoring/discipling are only tools. Here are things to consider what discussing any mentoring for your organization:

· Do you feel that mentoring is beneficial(if not,move on)?
· Will mentoring employees help you compete?
· Do you have the right people for mentoring others?
· Are you going to have a formal mentoring program?
· Are you willing to survey your employees for interest?

Sadly, many managers are missing out on building effective relationships with followers. One veteran worker explained that no one had every mentored her; she felt she could have benefited from the process, however. Her managers simply did not care. This generation of young workers are concerned about a caring organization. Mentoring can be a positive effort toward leadership development. Rev. Isaiah Blackman, the founder of mentoring organization for addicts called the Strength & Recovery Program, sees mentoring as a vital ingredient in growing young leaders. Selecting the right mentor for each person is critical. Rev. Blackman argues, “Young people often gravitate toward adults who take an interested in them. That’s why it’s important to have the right people mentoring.”

In summary, discipling and mentoring are both vital for life transformations. Don’t get caught not using it. Start today.

References:

Adsit, C. (2005). Go and Make What. Disciplemakers, International, Retrieved October 4, 2005, from http://www.milmin.com/resources/discipleship/gomakewhat.htm

Allen, T. & Poteet, M. (1999). Developing Effective Mentoring Relationships: Strategies from the Mentor’s Viewpoint. The Career Development Quarterly. Vol. 48, pg. 59-73

Bell (2002). Managers as Mentors. San Francisco, CA: Berrett-Koehler’s Publishers, Inc.

Organ, D. & Bateman, T. (1991). Organizational Behavior. Homewood, IL and Boston, MA: Irwin.

Johnson, C. & Hackman, M. (2000). Leadership: A Communication Perspective. Waveland Press.

© 2006 by Daryl D. Green

Daryl D. Green has published over 100 articles in the field of decision-making (personal and organizational), leadership, and organizational behavior. Mr. Green is also the author of two acclaimed books, Awakening the Talents Within and My Cup Runneth Over. He is a columnist, lecturer, professor, and management consultant. Mr. Green has a BS in engineering and a MA in organizational management. Currently, he is pursuing a doctoral degree in strategic leadership. For more information, visit his website at http://www.darylgreen.org